Not to embrace resistance would be to walk among the lost. Not to embrace resistance would be to say to the world and myself that I have no hope. I struggle daily with the contradiction of my existance. Invovled in business, in the economy, driving my car, living on credit and everyday I find myself wondering "…how can I get just a little further ahead, make more money, save more money.." I am ashamed of these thoughts and my willfull acceptance of my contradiction. I am ashamed not because I have done something wrong or have been "bad", but because my will is weak and I can see that I am a pretender. I have been reading writers such as Noam Chomsky, Edward Said, Paul Street, Vandana Shiva, Arundati Roy for years, but what have I actually done to commit to a future with a maximum of 350 parts per million. To a future where we many are not enslaved to the corporate task masters. To a future where there is a future worth living. I have done little to nothing and I am ashamed of this fact.
Yesterday, I was looking up rescue horses on the Internet and I came across "Gentle Ben" who is a rescue horse and currently resides at Out Back Jack's. Beneath a very sad picture of a horse trying to hide in a cluster of tree trunks was the following caption:
"…Gentle Ben is a 7 year old QH that will be arriving here on May 21st, 2012. This little guy has had a hard beginning in life. He went from being born in the killing field to being bought by a man who didn't treat him very well, and whom later abandoned him. He is vey shy and would rather hug a tree then take an apple from a man. We will be working with him and helping him learn how to love and be loved again. If you are interested in learning more about Ben, please contact Out Back Jack's.
Nov 2012 update: Ben is coming along well, but will never be able to be ridden as his spirit has been abused too badly. We have a lady who is willing to take him in as a companion for herself. ….. "
This struck me. Two broken spirits, two different species walking side by side in the forest, not touching, not trusting, hopeful for a glimpse,tenderness – dreaming each in their own way of compassion.
I do believe the current global economic situation is completely unsustainable. I do believe that if the majority of mankind does not consciously choose to regect the neo liberal capitalist corporate run away train we are on then the future will be one of only broken spirits, one without hope and lastly one where immagination has been slain.
So on behalf of this magnificent world and all the creatures that inhabit it I choose to be differrent. I choose to be labeled a freak, an outsider, an activist, a radical and a non conformist. These ideas are not new to me it's just that I have never claimed them as my own before. Therefore, on this first day, this new day I struggel to take off my old clothes – I wonder how long it will take.